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Staring down at the thing with growing horror, Spike shook his head wildly. "No way, no fucking way."
"Erm, yes...Spike, I appreciate your...um apprehension..."
"Apprehension?" Spike yelled at the Watcher. "Fuck apprehension. It's disgusting."
Giles sighed and shooed the sheep away from chewing on the encyclopedias on the lower shelves. "Sometimes we must put aside our self interests and..."
"No," Spike interrupted again. "Not on your fucking life. Not on MY fucking UNLIFE. Sorry, mate, but I'm not going to stick my willy in a bloody sheep."
"It's the only way to break the spell."
"You do it."
Removing his glasses, Giles pinched the bridge of his nose. He had a headache coming on and he was not in the mood to deal with a surly vampire and his romantic problems. "I explained this," he tried, patiently. "It must be someone who loves her."
"Then get the bog trotter. He loved her once."
"I assume your racial slur was directed at Angel?"
Spike glared and nodded shortly.
Giles sighed again, replaced his glasses and continued. "We cannot be certain that Angelus ever loved her. If someone who doesn't truly love her attempts to break the spell...he will join her in her current form."
Spike barked with laughter. "Perfect punishment for the ass. Then he can go around being buggered by randy shepherds."
"Spike, you are not helping..."
Something rubbed against his legs and Spike looked down to see the black sheep blinking up at him with wide, glazed eyes. "Cor...she's lovely even as a sheep." He sighed heavily, then glowered at the Watcher. "Get out."
Giles scrambled out of his chair and disappeared out the main doors of the library.
Dropping to his knees next to the sheep, Spike gently patted its head. "The things I do for you, luv." His free hand went to his belt buckle as he swore softly. "It better really be you, Dru, and once you're you again, we're going to have a long talk about screwing around with magic."
"Bleet."
End